Day Three hundred and thirty eight - Waiting for Black Metal records to come in the mail

Who : Have a Nice Life

Album name : Deathconsciousness

Formed : 2000

From : Middletown, Connecticut, U.S.

What do they play : Gothic rock / shoegaze / post-rock / dark ambient / industrial rock (at least according to Wikipedia)

Release date : January 24, 2008

There's a challenge me and a couple of friends of mine have been talking about for like a year now, and we've yet to get to it, which is to make a definitive list of our desert island discs. I both look forward to that challenge - and dread it as well. Because no matter how much I look at my record collection, and see plenty that I absolutely love, there are very, very few that match a criteria I'd like to follow for the creation of that list : on the one hand, and ideally, my choices would be records that I love from beginning to end. And there are many examples where there's at least that one song that I never fancied that much, and though I rarely skip them, they're never on the same par as the others, and as such I don't derive the same pleasure from having to listen to them. As well, I'd - and again ideally - want to choose a record that not only fills that first criteria, but one that can also challenge me in its listening. And a case could be made that those songs that I don't really love on otherwise flawless albums could be a challenge in and of themselves, but eh - some songs I'll never like. No, by 'challenging' I mean something that will make me not only listen to it, but to hear everything. Because every single note, every single line, every melody, just screams for attention, just begs for ever deeper understanding. However, asking all that from a bunch of records is a herculean task, at least for me. I can't think of very many records that would fit those criteria to a tee, if I'm honest. I'll always mostly have to compromise with the odd clunker here and there.

But then there are records like this one where everything is just perfect - or just perfect enough - for me to want to listen from beginning to end, no skips, no pauses, though it is a double album, and it's almost 90 minutes of music. And let's get this straight : this isn't music that's fun to listen to. This is heavy music, but not necessarily in a 'metal' kind of heavy, though it's got its moments. It's dark, and somewhat disturbing, and it leaves you thinking. Not just about the music, and the words, but about yourself. This is the soundtrack to your darkest days, to your moments of doubt. This is what's playing in the background while you wrestle with your demons. And having said that, this is music that somehow feels uplifting. It's music you want to listen to again and again, and understand, and that you'll sometimes find yourself humming, not really remembering where you heard the song, until it dawns on you. There is darkness here, yes, there is despair, there is hopelessness - but all in very human ways. All in ways we all can relate to. Because we've all been there, right? To some degree we've all felt lost, and felt the need, nay, the urge to question anything and everything. And this is such a seamless slab of great misery, that it becomes a rewarding journey to return to it often. 

I should point out that this band is relatively new to me - I only came across them some five years ago or so. Back when I had my first Instagram account I followed a lot of vinyl collectors, and there was this one Spanish girl - Susana - who always had the most amazing records. So many of those bands she showcased I'd never heard about, or just knew them in passing, and though I never listened to many of what she posted, some I found just too appealing to pass up on. It was the band's name that drew me, and very soon after I came across a similarly named band that produce an even bleaker sound - Lifelover. Though uncommon, it's not unheard of for me to come across a band that immediately becomes very relevant in my life. This is one such band, this is one such record, and to be completely honest? I haven't heard many records that even come close to this one.

I give this one ten out of ten Bloodhails.